XXX

This blog has no adult content, unless slaying monsters qualifies as adult. I put that on there mostly for my own amusement, and to see if you, Mr. T, ever call me to come talk to you about some "issues." But I can surely assure you, there is no pornography on this blog. That word is fun to say. Pornography. Say it out loud. Now yell it at the top of your lungs. Now yell this, "Captain Rhubarb made off with my leg lamp and my sleeping cap!" Run down the street and yell that. That would be cool. When you get arrested/thrown into an asylum, I'll laugh.
Easter is another Pagan holiday stolen by the Christians.Isn't it weird that Jesus just happened to die the first Sunday of spring after a full moon? Jesus, It's like he died over and over again. Or is it when he was resurrected? I don't know. But anyway. I am an Atheist. So is my sister, but she says she believes in science. Which I think is hilarious. Anyway, I thought I would take on the challenge of reading the bible. I'm about 10 pages in and I totally want this to be a movie. I can see it all now. Big man with a gray beard makes the earth and heaven randomly appear, and he creates all sorts of things that inhabit the earth. Since he's so old, he needs a break on the seventh day of creationism, Which is why were supposed to celebrate god on Sunday. But, if he uses the Gregorian calendar, That should be a Saturday. Either that or Sunday came at the end of the week when god was around. It doesn't even explain why god does this. It just says he does. And it was good. What the f$@k does that mean? It was good? Maybe he should of tried not giving us the ability to sin or cause war or kill each other! That might have been good! He also created light. He probably should have done that first so he could see what he was doing. And why does God do this? Probably because he was bored. What would you do if you were god?
In positive news, I got an easter basket today. Which I wasn't expecting. Probably because I'm 15. I mean 37. I think I'm supposed to lie about my age.In it was a bucket of chocolate. Which is now mostly gone. Here's a picture of Gargoyle Moe which was crapfully drawn in 4-5 minutes:

Totally worth it, huh? See you all around next week, and remember, PORN IS BAD! Also, I found out yesterday that my great uncle drank hydrogen peroxide every day of his life.

A big load of @#$%.

This end of the year stuff sure is getting busy. I have so much crap to do all the time that I hardly even have time to finish my math. I never have time during the week to do anything, so all projects and what-not are put off until the weekend, usually sunday. I don't go to church, which gives me a whole day off. So, in comparison to other people, it's like I get a whole extra day off. Some kids I know have so much churchy-junk to do, that they only consider Saturday their weekend. They don't even count Sunday. My usual day off is Wednesday. Why? Well, really I just work extra hard that day to get 3 hours at the end to go play D&D. Which I hardly have time for to do anyway. None of my family enjoys my nerdy exploits, so it often feels like I am alone. As an added bonus, my mom was talking about how she felt as if she wasn't being involved enough with my sister's and I's lives, so today, when I asked her to help me with my homework, she asked me why my sister couldn't help me. I think I see why you aren't feeling involved. Finally when she did agree to help me, she said she didn't know how to do it. My sister is taking 4 AP classes, I am taking 2 honor's classes with the addition of an AP class next year. I can hardly handle my life now, why handle it less next year? My parents say that life only gets harder as you get older, which means I'm screwed. Really badly screwed. I always assumed that you worked your butt off in school so you could get an easier life as an adult. That appears not to be the case, as my mom goes to work and I may not see her until the next day, often working from 5 in the morning to 12 in the morning. She doesn't get overtime. My sister is never gonna have time to do anything ever again in her life after this year. She's trying to get into Princeton College and is severely worried she won't make it. Me? I'm planning on any college that both offers a good education, and the best scholarship. I don't care if it isn't Yale, I just want to live my life. I believe we have 3 purposes in life. The first was learned from standard science. Reproduce. It is the only goal of every other creature on Earth. This goal I am actually not planning on attaining. The first I have known all my life yet have never accepted it, because I am so incredibly afraid of it that it makes me cry when I think of it. Death. It marks the end of our ability to do anything in this world, but it must be done if we are to live. If we live, we must die. If we die, we must have lived. The third was learned from my friend's older brother. I overheard him talking. He was looking at another of his brother's shirts that was from his church and it said, "What is the purpose of life?' on it. His brother kicked it out of the way as he said, "To have fun." It's so obvious, yet so complex. Thanks for reading this no one, Gargoyle Moe.

Not Again!

I'm super sorry this post is late! IT WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN!

This week I'm giving you a section of my RPG game.

Dylan’s

RPG

Version 1.0

This game is based off of a role-playing game entitled Dungeons & Dragons. Yes, that is nerdy. But this game is somewhat like it; however I am claiming none of their product to be mine, and if they sue me, I never sold anything. This game is virtually awesome, and combines some ideas from both D&D 4^th edition and D&D 3^rd edition. This game attempts to use a little bit more of the role-playing idea than dungeons & dragons 4^th edition uses. Anyhow, please enjoy this game. I think it’s pretty neat.

© 2011 Dylan Waters. All rights reserved. Any names and all affiliated titles belong to me. Permission to photocopy for personal use.

Content changes

0.0 Idea assembled. Guide is written down on loose leaf paper.

1.0 Guide is written, better formulated system. Changes to character sheet were made as needed.

Introduction

Dylan’s RPG is an unnamed role playing game with immense magic, strong monsters and wondrous lands. Well, it may only be that if you have a good Game Master or GM for short and good players. When the term player is said, we typically refer to the people playing the heroes or protagonists of the story. This is just a short introduction for a so far shortly made game. The current level cap is 5, but this is sure to change soon as I develop more possible ways to advance and as things are improved and ideas are formulated. This is just the beginning, so wait patiently for this guide to continue.

As said above, this game is about monsters and magic. Usually you will be playing a character but you may be playing the game master. The rules for being a player are in the next section while being a game master are in section 7.

You will need a standard set of six polyhedral dice. You will require a 20 sided, 12 sided, 10 sided, 8 sided, 6 sided and 4 sided dice. The twenty sided is the most important, and for future reference, the dice will be referred to as d# like d8 as for an 8 sided dice.

Being a player

            When we say player, we mean being someone who plays a hero character and adventures in the world the game master makes up. You play a character in a world covered in evil, and are either trying to stop it, or you are joining it. Hero’s have a hard time fitting in but are usually more popular than most. They can be anyone anywhere, but are often a little set aside from regular folk. You often adventure into dungeons, wilderness and into great cities, finding quests and exploring. You often gain fame quickly, and are given very important jobs. The rest of the guide for players can be found in the character creation section, which also happens to explain most of the rules.

That's all. This is Gargoyle Moe. See you next week.

Drugs are great! (For medicinal purposes)

Sorry this post is late. I forgot to finish it yesterday. Now, in my last post I gave Sucker Punch a bad name. That wasn't good of me. It gave me poor morality points. So now I will write:
Sucker Punch Review: Part II!
Sucker Punch was a great movie. It had intense action, deep immersing plot, amazing affects, cool slo-mo, and even more. Although the movie is a little more adult than pg-13, it was still an awesome movie. As it started out it was sad and creepy. But to deal with her problem of getting a lobotomy in 5 days, she imagines a whole new setup for her life. She imagines herself an orphan and that a priest brought her in. The only true knowledge you find out about her is that she is 20 and female. Her name is baby doll, as you find out in the movie. Now obviously, this isn't her real name. That's her nickname. To cope with her problem, while she dances, she imagines herself in a different world where she talks to her guardian angel and she attempts to escape a mental asylum. Then in the back of the place is a pleasure club where a man has the little girl dance for people to make money. Why use criminally insane children? Reasons unknown. Her first imaginary realm is her talking to her guardian angel in a shogun-like Japanese place. Afterwards, he hands her 3 clips, a magnum, and a katana. Then she ends up fighting 3 stone samurai. If you've ever been to hajomaje, you will see the first guy is identical. Kinda creepy. Afterwards, she gathers her friends, and they go and disable a bomb, kill a dragon, and fight undead German Nazis. Epic stuff. Just to clear it up.
Now here's a collection of pictures.


Yeah. It's what it is. Straight up, homeslicers. Anyway, me mom and me sister (yes I mean me) have gone to Princeton because my sister wants to get into Princeton. So me and my pa have been hanging out. I've stayed up til' 3 two nights now! Hurray! Like Yesterday, I was watching CW30, for reasons I can't remember, when Pokemon 3: The Movie came on, and I watched that. I got up 6 hours after it ended. Last night I fell asleep in my clothes. It is 11:15 right now, and I've already had a monster energy. By the end of this week, I'll be a pot addict! I'm just kidding. Unless I get cancer or Insomnia. Because sometimes they give you those to treat those things. What I want to know is why my family isn't getting the package from Comcast, I mean XFINITY!!! (Because that somehow makes it better) That gets Playboy Premium. I'm just kidding. Had you worried there for a second didn't I? Anyway, if you are reading this, For shame! No one reads this blog. Well anyway, Gargoyle Moe is leaving this place, so see you all later, suckers!